Sassy Black Friend

Pre-Thanksgiving Hangover and Home Depot

My first mistake was going to Home Depot with a hangover. It’s big and loud and full of people. None of those are ideal conditions for someone in that state. Especially me. I’ve been getting hangovers for a few years now, and I know how to deal with them. Eggs, water, Advil, a sofa, and some bad television. But with the family hovering, that just wasn’t happening this morning. So, off I went with my dad to find some weird thing he needed to fix something that didn’t seem broken at the house. It started out so well.

I napped in the car, because he drives like he’s pushing the car up a hill, so it took 30 minutes to get a few miles. We get a good parking space (everyone else was at the grocery store I guess), and shuffle inside. Well, I shuffled. He was so giddy there might have been skipping. That man loves a home project. Normally, so do I. our happiest times in recent years have involved paining, putting together furniture, and hanging things. Finding the perfect thing to fiddle with, a fire pit, vertical blinds, gutters, an a/c compressor, deadbolt locks, a shop-vac, whatever, can be therapeutic.

As soon as we got in the store I realized this was a huge mistake. The place wasn’t full, but everyone there was frantic. Half were looking for chairs or tables or plywood – somewhere to put their relatives for Thanksgiving, and the other half seemed to be looking for supplies to deep fry turkeys. Jeebus. I couldn’t deal. Too much yelling, and I almost got smacked in the head with a ladder – twice. I whimpered for a while and my dad let me go stand by the pain swatches. It was soothing until that stupid mixing machine started. Like a jackhammer in my brain.

Dad got his big bag of whatever and we scampered out of there as quickly as possible. I was traumatized and pissy. Happy Thanksgiving!